First Sane Day
by pippydog
Summary: AU Sebastian Castellanos survived the evil within, but at a cost. Can he deal with the consequences? Or is it too late? No slash, may or may not be out of character, my first fanatic, so go easy on me.
1. Chapter 1

***First Sane Day***

Detective Sebastian Castellanos stepped out of the hospital and breathed in the first fresh air he'd had in days.

Days? He wondered. Or weeks? Could it be months? But no, as he looked around at his surroundings, he had somehow missed the army of squad cars and officers aiming their hand guns, obviously ready to shoot anything that came out of the hospital, excluding Sebastian. It looked as if he could only have been in the hospital for, at most, 24 hours. All though, since it was still raining, the detective assumed he could only have been in the hospital for a few hours.

Not hospital, Sebastian thought, Ruvik's mind. The dank, dark place that would haunt his dreams forever. He would have either gone insane or turned into a Haunted if he had stayed in that place much longer, the only reason he hadn't done either while in there was because of Joseph and Kidman.

Suddenly, as the thought processed in Seb's mind, a tsunami of pain, grief and guilt rushed through Sebastian and was so strong it almost knocked him off his feet. Seb didn't cry, he couldn't after all the years of loss, but felt as if he should and also felt the enormous hole that the younger man had left in his heart. Joseph, his best (and really only) friend was gone and their was nothing he could do about it. It pained him to think that Joeseph's last moments were spent in the abyss of that insanity and were ended by his other partner, Kidman. Sebastian also wondered where Kidman might be, she hadn't meant to hit Joseph, she was aiming for Leslie, and she must feel horrible and worried about what happened. But right now Sebastian was just trying to reason out a situation where Joseph was still alive.

He trudged down the steps of the hospital and was immediately helped by one of the paramedics who wrapped a shock blanket around him. As he sat in the back of the ambulance, he thought about his friend and was trapped in a river of denial about what happened, he couldn't possibly be dead, not Joseph. For a while Seb watched the stretchers come out of the hospital and hoped. His hopes were dashed when the only thing to come out of the hospital were body bags, that was, until something else came out.


	2. Chapter 2

Chp 2

***First Sane Day***

Sebastian almost missed what came out of the hospital last, he had given up. Although he didn't want to, Sebastian finally had accepted that he would never see his partner again. He and Joseph practically did everything together since Joseph had no close family and Seb's...well, he didn't have any either. Joseph really could have been partnered with anyone, he was smart, skilled with a gun, and easy to get along with, so that made him a good fit with anyone, but his superiors realized that Sebastian wasn't. Joseph was the person on the squad that he could work with, that's why they were partners, although Joseph always argued otherwise. Sebastian didn't really care, they always worked well together. When his daughter died and Myra went missing (left him according to Joseph) Sebastian drank the lonely nights away, but eventually, lonely nights turned into unbearable days, and Sebastian was drinking all the time. Joseph, being his normal worry-wart self, reported him to Internal and they, along with Joseph, beat the alcoholism out of him. At first, this was a strain on their relationship, but, somehow, it turned into a strong friendship, and had been ever since.

Losing his only friend was not something that Sebastian accepted easily, but did after waiting for five hours in an ambulance hoping that he could find his partner. Sebastian hadn't given up hope yet because when he finally was released from Ruvik's mind, he saw all the bodies of people that had died in There, Jaimez, Connolly, and others, but he didn't see Joseph. He figured that if Joseph had died, he would have seen his body. It was either that, or his body was just wasn't in plain sight, but Sebastian favored the former, that was, until he had given up all hope.

He sighed and started to walk away from the horror that was Beacon Mental Hospital, when suddenly he heard a man protesting. At first, he dismissed it as one of the paramedics, but why would they be arguing? Sebastian turned around, curious. He only caught a glimpse of the man in question, dark hair, glasses, medium build, but it was enough to intrigue him further.

Sebastian started to walk quickly toward the ambulance the man was in. He felt the hope building up in his chest. Don't do it, a voice in the back of his his head told him, it will only lead to more disappointment. But the larger part of his mind was stronger and the hope only increases as he saw the EMTs running around treating the man in the ambulance. Sebastian pushed passed the medical personnel gaining a few funny looks and warnings that he shouldn't be there, but he didn't care. He reached the car, turned the corner, and looked inside.

It turned out the larger part of his mind was correct for once in his life.

*****Authors Note: I'm not sure where this story is going, so I NEED you guys to review. It is the only reason I will continue this story, I need feedback on the story, constructive criticism is VERY welcome. If I get one review, I will continue to update.**


	3. Chapter 3

***First Sane Day***

"...Joseph?", Sebastian couldn't believe his eyes. In front of him, in the ambulance, sat Joseph, his partner, his best friend.

Joseph didn't look good to say the least. His shirt, which had been ripped to shreds, was removed and Sebastian could see everything. He still bore some of the marks of the horrors he endured. His torso was a mess, from not only being shot in the shoulder on the bus, but also from the wound that Kidman has inflicted and had bruising all over, from where, Seb could only guess. Joseph's shoulder was in a sling and paramedics had already laid out dressings for his wounds, but the real damage could be seen clear as day on Joseph's face.

His skin was pale with a greenish tint and his blood-red lips stood out stark against it. Joseph's eyes were sunken into his skull and the usual spark that was always in them, even in Ruvik's mind, even while he was turning into a Haunted, was absent. The only time that Sebastian had ever seen his friend like this was after he saved him from the guillotine, when Joseph had tried to write himself off as a danger. Sebastian had barely been able to save him.

The looks on Joseph's face when he realized that Seb was there contorted quickly into surprise, followed by relief and something Seb couldn't quite place. Guilt? Regret? It foreshadowed something, and Sebastian was sure he wouldn't like it. Sebastian was frozen in place.

"Hey Seb,", Joseph's face was uncharacteristically expressionless now, "fancy meeting you here.", he said sarcastically.

It was then that Sebastian broke out of his stupor. He ran over to Joseph and embraced him in a gentle hug.

Joseph stiffened at the unusual behavior from Sebastian; even before the accident, he had never expressed too many emotions like that, people knew if he liked them and Seb didn't feel like he had to express it. Now, though, even Sebastian couldn't stop the relief and joy he felt.

"Christ, Joseph, I thought you were dead.", Sebastian tightened his bear hug a little, but when Joseph winced a little, he realized that his wounds must be be hurting him, badly, and he let go.

"Not yet,", Joseph smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes, "are you alright Seb?" Joseph looked worried, but suddenly turned away.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Sebastian couldn't keep a grin off his face, he couldn't believe that his partner was sitting in the back of a dingy, New York City, ambulance. Then that thought really sunk in, Sebastian had thought that Joseph looked bad, but the reality was worse than that. It wasn't just his outer wounds; when Joseph turned back around and looked at Sebastian, he realized that the look on Joseph's eyes that he thought was guilt, was actually the look of utter despair and hopelessness of a man who knew he was doomed.

**AN: Here's where you decide.**

**There are three choices on how this story should continue.**

**1\. There are a lot of feels and fluff**

**2\. There are still a lot of feels, but I could also bring a little of the games sci-fi nature into it**

**Or... 3. You guys leave suggestions in the reviews, I'm open to new ideas**

**Again, thanks for reading this :) I really appreciate it.**


	4. Chapter 4

***First Sand Day***

Sebastian moved in towards Joseph, but was quickly cut off by a group of paramedics swarming him and treating his wounds.

As the shock and joy of discovering Joseph alive wore off, Sebastian noticed he had not come out unscathed. He had a large gash where he had been impaled, his ankle felt sprained, at least, from his initial meeting with a certain chainsaw, and he was covered from head to toe in cuts and bruises.

He let he paramedics work on him as he thought about what he had just seen. Something was very wrong with Joseph, and Sebastian was worried. The look absolute hopelessness and lack of emotion disturbed him. He saw that look on Joseph's face in that LSD-trip of a mind Ruvik stuck them in, and although it alarmed Sebastian, it made more sense in there. They were out, Ruvik was gone and Kidman was nowhere to be found, yet; there wasnt any clear reason for Joseph's behavior. However, Seb recognized the look from somwhere he couldn't remember. They was something in the back of his mind, something important, he need to remember...

His thoughts were interrupted when the paramedics told him he was good to go. Sebastian was reluctant to leave Joseph, but he was exhausted and Joseph probably was too.

He walked back over to the ambulance and saw that Joseph was still being worked on. He had a distant look on his face, like he was thinking about something that was troubling him. He also had a kind of grim look about him that set Sebastian on edge, again.

"Hey, Joseph," Sebastian came up and put a hand on his shoulder, Joseph jumped, ",you gonna be alright? I was heading home but, I can stay if you want.", he asked causally.

"No Seb, I'm fine," Joseph gave him a small smile, "Go home, get some rest. I'll... I'll see you tomorrow."

"Are you sure? You don't look so good."

He scoffed, "You're one to talk Seb. You look like you were hit with a bus."

"Thanks." Sebastian replied sarcastically, "Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow, we can get a drink or something." He turned to walk away, but Joseph wasn't finished.

"Hey Seb," he called tentatively.

Sebastian turned back around, "Yeah?"

Joseph hesitated, "We're... we're friends right?"

Sebastian was surprised, and a little cautious, "Yeah, of course we are Joesph. Why do you ask?"

Joseph's eyes turned sad, "I just wanted to make sure you knew", he murmured.

"Don't worry Joseph, everything going to be fine, I'll see you tomorrow, bye." Sebastian smiled and got in his car.

When he got to his small apartment, he realised how much he had missed Krimson City. The sound of the subways, the smell of street vendors foods, even the bustling people on the streets, everything so normal, it was comforting. Knowing that Joseph was okay also took a load of his mind and Seb was calmer than he had been in what seemed like a few weeks.

He sat down in a reclining chair and tried to get some sleep, but something came back to bug him. It was Joseph's earlier expression, Seb was still trying to understand it, as he never had been good at reading emotions. It something bad, he knew that at least, and it probably had something to do with what happened...back there. Thing was, Sebastian couldn't tell if it was something he should worry about, or if it was something Joseph had to work out on his own.

Sebastian sighed, he was worried, but he needed some sleep if he was to figure this out. He hadn't slept in what felt like a while. In reality, he couldn't have been got for over an hour, but it really didn't matter. He sunk into the chair and closed his eyes. Besides, if he didn't get some sleep, he probably end up killing himself somehow-

He shot up out of the chair.

Oh crap.

He ran over to the door and fumbled with the handle.

Oh crap.

He jumped into his car and raced down the street, speeding post other cars.

Oh crap.

Sebastian remembered where he had seen that expression.

Frozen on the faces of suicide victims.

Joseph was going to kill himself.

Oh crap.

*****A/N*** Okay, next chapter is obviously going to be more intense than the next, so WARNING, don't worry I'll put it on the next chapter too. Tell me what you guys thought so I can fix my horrific writing. Thankies**


	5. Chapter 5

***First Sane Day***

**A/N: WARNING: there is some cursing and mention of suicide, so trigger warning, this chapter is a little heavy again, WARNING**

Sebastian sped faster and faster on the road, swerving around cars and taking fast, sharp turns. Millions of thoughts flew around his head like snowflakes in a blizzard. Why would he do this? How could he do this? How _could _he do this? Sebastian's hand flew to his waist and he cursed. His holster was empty, Joseph probably sneaked it in the midst of Sebastian's shock.

Sebastian was flying now, everything was a blur. The trees and city and sky melted into a pool and became nothing more than a puddle for Sebastian to step in on his way, nothing distracted him. Even his thoughts were ruled by one question, Would Joseph still be there when Sebastian arrived?

Sebastian felt like banging his head against the car. How could he have been so stupid? Joseph had just come out of a living nightmare where he was turning into a monster, of course he would be unstable. At least that's what Sebastian hoped, if Joseph was emotionally unstable, it would easier to calm him down than if something even bigger was wrong. He shuddered at the thought.

Sebastian turned into Joseph's apartment complex and screeched to a halt in front of Joseph's building. He didn't even bother to lock his car as he sprinted up the stairs to Joseph's door.

He knocked on the door and asked, "Jospeh? It's Sebastian, you there?" In case all of this was a misunderstanding. Sebastian hoped to God it was, although it probably wasn't.

"Yeah Seb, I'm here." These four words shattered any and all hopes Sebastian had. Joseph's voice projected everything he had seen in his expression in the ambulance. Sadness, depression, hopelessness, they were all there.

Sebastian tried to open the door, it was locked.

"Joseph, what are you doing? Can you open the door?",Sebastian asked, keeping his voice from raising.

"I'm pretty sure you know what I'm doing by now", Joseph said softly through the door, it sounded like Joseph was in the living room, maybe the kitchen.

"What's wrong Joseph? We can just go get a drink and talk about it, please?" Sebastian was pleading at this point, trying not to let Joseph hear the fear in his voice.

He heard a low chuckle come from Joseph. "Always with the drinking, it's not good for your health, you know that Seb."

Sebastian was getting frustrated with how lightly Joseph was taking this now. Laughing it off and making small talk was not going to end this the way Sebastian wanted.

"Shit like this is what drives me to drinking," he said angrily, voice raising, "you know that Joseph."

Joseph went silent at that for a moment, and Sebastian was worried that maybe he went to far.

"I'm sorry Sebastian, I really, truly am, but it's only a matter of time before... it's just better this way", he heard Joseph say, mirroring his word at the guillotine, making Sebastian even angrier.

"SUICIDE ISN'T THE ANSWER!" Sebastian yelled loudly and pounded his fist on the door, "Open up Joseph! We can talk about this and calm down before either of us do something stupid", he growled.

"This isn't suicide," Joseph said softly, " it's an execution Seb."

Sebastian's mind was spinning now, thinking that Joseph was possibly insane, that he had to be, because why else would he say that?

"What are you talking about?",he asked.

"I could hurt people, Sebastian, I could hurt _you_", Joseph went on, sounding horrified "It's not worth it, I'm not worth it Seb. I can't even control myself, I can't stop it".

He heard Joseph's voice break, "I'm sorry Seb."

Sebastian was truly frightened now. Scared for his partner, for what was happening now. Events were speeding up too quickly and Sebastian couldn't keep up. What did Joseph mean?

"Joseph, I don't understand."

"It's back Sebastian, the headaches, the bleeding, _the ringing_," he heard Joseph's voice tighten "it's driving me insane, but more importantly, soon, it will turn me into a monster, again. I have to stop it, before something happens that I can't stop."

He was stunned, Sebatian knew that this would have to do with the Beacon, but he would never have thought in a million years...

"Joseph, it's gone, it was gone in Beacon, you said it was, it never even existed! How could-" his rambling was interrupted by Joseph's denial.

"No,no,no,no! It's not gone Sebastian, it never was never gone! It got worse, and it followed me into reality, if this is reality!" Joseph insisted, sounding frustrated, "Nothing feels real."

"Joseph, it's only been a little while since you got out, it might go away, just calm down and open the door", Sebastian pleaded.

"No, I'm sorry Seb"

Sebastian heard the click of the revolver. His eyes went wide and he started pounding on the door furiously and yelling.

"Joseph?! Joseph open the door!", Sebastian started ramming his shoulder against the door, trying to force it open.

"JOSEPH, OPEN THE DAMNED DOOR!" He shouted at the top of his lungs now, not caring if neighbors heard him.

"Joseph, PLEASE," he begged, "don't do this to me."

Sebastian paused and all was silent, and his hopes went full, he thought that maybe something he had said worked, maybe he come opening the door any sec-

A shot rang out.

Sebastian shattered and broke into a million pieces, he felt like he had suddenly been shoved underwater without taking a breath, everything was sucked out of him an, he felt like he was drowning. He didn't stop though, he pounded against the door even harder and it finally broke open.

He stumbled through the doorway and slowly shuffled towards the kitchen, afraid of what he would find and of what he would do when he saw.

When he reached the kitchen, he was shocked by what he found, but not upset at all.

If fact, he was overjoyed when he found Joseph on the floor, clutching the pistol with a bullet hole in the wall.

**A/N please review and give me your ideas, I really need them, also, I would like to thank Hana-chan98 for some awesome advice that really helped me with the story. Thanks guys!**


	6. Chapter 6

***First Sane Day***

Sebastian broke out of his shock and lurched towards Joseph and grabbed the gun from his shaking hands. He then stumbled backwards into the wall and slumped against it, all the adrenaline having left his body. Sebastian, too, was shaking now, from the extremely potent mix of shock and relief, the thoughts running around his head weren't helping either.

Joseph lifted his head and smiled slightly and said, "I'll take you up on the drink now".

Sebastian looked over at him and sighed.

The ride to the bar was long and silent as Sebastian was simultaneously worried sick about his partner and furious with himself. He should have realised that something was wrong after they both got out. He should have never let Joseph go home by himself! _What if I hadn't been there in time? What if Joseph had actually..._ Sebastian went cold at the thought. He had almost lost Joseph, now he had to find out why.

Those were his thoughts as they finally reached the small pub just a few miles from Joseph's complex. They walked into the dingy restaurant and sat down at the bar.

The bartender walked up cleaning a glass with a dirty rag, "What'll you have?", he asked roughly.

"A beer for me", Seb said

"Whiskey", Joseph said and ran his hand through his hair.

Sebastian looked over at Joseph and said back to the bartender, "We'll have two beers thanks."

"Sure" the bartender walked back to get the drinks.

"So, Seb, you don't think I can handle my alcohol? What was that-", Joseph started.

"No, you know what Joseph, let's stop screwing around here. I want to know what is happening and what just happened", Sebastian didn't feel like dancing around this topic for long.

"I told you, Seb-"

Sebastian interrupted again, impatient, "Yeah, I know that Joseph, but how do you know that it's followed you out of the STEM? And why did you think that the only answer was to...kill yourself?"

He smiled slightly and said, "Well it's not exactly like they have a cure for it".

Sebastian tensed up, "Dammit, Joseph, this isn't a joke", he practically growled. He was getting frustrated with Joseph acting like this wasn't serious, like it was a joke.

"Don't you think I know that Seb? Why else do you think I would try that stunt?",his partner's face was filled with guilt and defeat.

At the realization that talking about this was taking a toll on Joseph, Sebastian softened up and put his hand on his partner's shoulder.

"Sorry Joseph", he said, "Why don't you start with how you know that it's still happening?"

He sighed and took a gulp from his beer. "It was almost right after I came out of the Stem. I'm sure you must have noticed it, it felt exactly like it did in the Stem, headache, ringing, etcetera.", he said tiredly, "I figured it must have been a lingering effect, until my nose started to bleed, and I started to change, and then I blacked out. It must not have been for long, since I was back when the paramedics found me, but it felt the same as when I was in the Stem, maybe even stronger", Joseph was getting pretty worked up at this point and Sebastian tried to calm him down.

"Well maybe your right Joseph, it could just be a lingering effect, a side effect from being in the Stem so long. Your right, I felt it too, but I didn't turn, it was probably just that one time, there's no reason to think that it's permanent", Sebastian insisted.

"Yeah Seb, that would make sense, if it hadn't already happened again." Joseph's head sunk in to his hands.

"What?! When did it happened?!" Sebastian demanded.

"Just a little while after I got to my apartment. It's never happened with so little time between incidences, what if it keeps happening, what if I change, permanently?" Joseph's face was contorted in pain and fright. "What if I hurt, or even kill somebody while I'm like that? Do you understand now, why I did what I did?", he implored.

"Joseph, I'm never going to understand why you tried to end your own life, but..." He held up his hand as Joseph opened his mouth to argue, "but, I understand what going on, and I understand that I will do whatever I have to to fix this."

Joseph looked surprised, "What do you mean Seb?"

"What do you think I mean? I'm saying that we'll fix whatever is happening to you and stop these incidents. You think I'd just leave you to become a zombie?", he asked jokingly.

Joseph smiled, but the expression was quickly replaced by a frown.

"I don't think you should be involved in this, Sebastian."

"What?! Why?", he demanded

Joseph looked over at him and seemed to be debating on whether to tell him or not.

"I know that we're friends, Seb, and I think that because of that, you won't be able to do what's necessary if I do permanently change", he sighed, "I don't want to put you in that situation either, if it comes to that."

"Joseph, it's not going to come to that, we are going to get rid of any trace of the Stem in you, trust me."

Joseph bit his lip, "Thanks Seb, I do trust you," he looked out the window, "I just don't trust myself." He said under his breath.

"Come on, let's finish this"

Seb slapped some bills on the counter as he and Joseph walked out of the dirty bar.

A woman walked out of the Stem lab. She hurried towards a large, brightly lit office, just off to the side of the examining tables, desperate to tell her superior of what she had just witnessed. The woman rushed in to the office and screeched to a halt in front a large white desk. A figure sat at the desk looking over some papers, but was hidden by a light shinning from behind.

"What is it?", the monotone voice asked

The young woman brushed some brown hair from her face, "Director, we have a problem", she said seriously.

The figure looked up from the papers, "Explain."

"One of the test subjects has lingering traces of Stem technology in them, a side effect we hadn't found in the reports", she said.

"Test subject? Which one?"

"Joseph Oda"

"The detective?", the figure smiled, "You should be able to take care of him, Kid."

"He's changing," the woman stated, "just as he did in the Stem."

The smile slipped from the figures face, "What? When did this happen?"

"Just as he awoke from the Stem, he turned for about a minute and a half before turning back just before some paramedics found him.", the younger woman said, "I believe that he may be a threat to our mission, Hanson."

"I agree," the figure stood up, fixed her platinum blonde bun and said, " I guess we'll just have to take care of this then. Set up a containment team and suit up, Kid", Hanson smiled, "We're going hunting."

**A/N: SORRY! I apologize for the super late update, but I had a bad case of writer's block for months, any-who, have this chapter and my apologies, and please review! Thank you so much!**

**P.S. Thanks TheAngelOfFate, I really liked your ideas and I'm using most of them as shown XP**


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